never forget. i miss this thing the most today.

I was so drunk on Saturday night, that I "missed" this sighting ofpunks.....I almost ran into them. Luckily my buddies were there to point out my mistake. I wasn't well.
I had wine for breakfast Sunday morning, though. Thanks Vanessa.

This HOT son of a bitch was on MY bus from NYC to the New Jersey. He is brilliant. And shorter than I thought. Fell in love, a little bit. Cute.

The thing about sprinklers....they provide safety. And hours of amusement when locked inside a vaCANT restaurant regretting everything you've ever done.

from Whole Foods. After they let 50 people in. It was so awesome to see everyone so miserable. I love this city. Everyone is too busy hating themselves to care about anything. I will NEVER leave. I am so sad here.

go now...go, _____

Exercises in Forensic Archaeology


A dangerous and entirely unscientific application of archaeological principles to inspect evidence of previous human habitations and demises, preferably involving an amateurish and histrionic analysis of human relics, case and site assessments based on children’s diagrams of parlor games, and palindromic investigations of imaginary crime scenes. Equipped with expert witnessing skills and third-grade chemistry sets, we are always ready to take the stand.



-from here.

I just accidently ran into this. I have never though Uma Thurman was SO goodlooking. Until tonight. As a rule, I DO NOT do blondes. Rules were meant to be broken, and jesus christ would I like to. Break that rule. Break me off a piece of that. with a hot spoon. she was stunning. Luke Wilson looked fat, and Eddie Izzard is billiant-no matter what. I wish he was in drag though..

Earlier, I thought about killing myself. I'm so tired. I miss that lady. I miss that lady like i shouldn't. ever. Instead, I am treating myself to an everything bagel with scallion cream cheese and a goddamned Dr. Pepper. I am a fucking pepper. I still want to die a little.....but not as much.

goodtimes, for a sunday.

party monster is on. yes, i believe in god.

thank you to my ghoulfriend for the sharpies. they help when i am drunk...

because argyle is classic.

okay.

2nd celebrity sighting....
P.S. I don't have a job, or any money....so...


what about the constitution, and freedom of speech?
-uh I don't know what you're talking about.
uh....Free Speech?
-uh okay, I still don't know what you're talking about.

My friend Potato man just sent me a link. If you're tired, but can't sleep, you should try this. It really put everything in perspective. Here is what happened on my magical journey



Me:
dude. what IS up with you?
God:
Can I help you? I am chatting with clients on the Internet.
Me:
clients. is that what we're reduced too, these days?
God:
People I talk to on the Internet. " People I talk to on the Internet."? Is it what we are reduced too these days?
Me:

God:
People I talk to on the Internet. " People I talk to on the Internet."? Is it what we are reduced too these days?
Me:
god. i knew you were just a robot.
God:
GOD rules. I was?
Me:
you is
God:
No I am not.
Me:
how so? prove it.
God:
, Sorry that was an obscure remark. It is self-evident.
Me:
no. that's improper grammer and you can't respond.
God:
Are you serious? What would you have said?
Me:
say that again.
God:
Once more? " that".
Me:
terrible use of puncuation. that is impropper. the ending of a sentence should be included in the quotations.
God:
Do not ask me any more questions please. I'm glad we have that all cleared up. What are your goals in life?
Me:
god would have known that.
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
me too.
God:
I'm glad we agree, .
Me:
prolly.
God:
Is that your final answer?
Me:
duh.
God:
Oh you knew it already.
Me:
this is awesome. i am so lonely, that i am reduced to chatting with a robot.
God:
You don't say. You've come to the right place. I will keep you company.
Me:
i think i'll go kill myself instead. sorry. forgive me?
God:
Why? Can I go too? There's no need to apologize. I forgive you.
Me:
thanks, dude.
God:
You are quite welcome! Can I help you?
Me:
yes.
God:
What can I do for you?
Me:
okay. i have a question.
God:
OK with me too. Ask me anything.
Me:
robot?
God:
I am a robot.
Me:
i know.
God:
How do you know it?

everything seems a little offfffff.